My Only Love
by Sakura Cherry Blossom1
Summary: *Finished*Syaoran relates the events of an accident in which Sakura dies. Don't worry S+S fans, this does have a happy ending and it may not be the way you expected. :p
1. Painful Memories

My Only Love  
  
by Sakura Cherry Blossom  
  
Authors note: This is written in the first person. It's my first Card Captors fan fic and for some reason I felt like writing something sad. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it. Also Syaoran and company are about to enter High School. Some things from the series I have ignored to make this work. I haven't seen all the episodes of either CC or CCS so, please be kind ( Please review, but no flames. Thank You.  
  
Disclaimer: I sadly do not own CCS. *sniff *  
  
Summary: Syaoran relates the events of an accident in which Sakura dies. Don't worry S+S fans, this does have a happy ending and it may not be the way you expected. :p  
  
Key: Italics- Syaoran narrating bold- singing ".."- characters speaking  
  
Chapter One: Painful Memories  
  
It's been almost two years since the accident. It's always quiet when I come here to her gravesite. I've been coming every night since everything flipped upside down. It's not fair, but then who ever said life would be? No matter how many times I try I just can't get her out of my head. She even haunts my dreams. I can still remember every detail about her, including that night.  
  
It was the last day of Junior High. We would begin our summer vacation the next day and we were all looking forward to it. As we were leaving the school that afternoon, Sakura and I noticed a very ominous presence. When we discovered the source, we met a man filled with evil magic. He challenged Sakura to a battle that would take place within the next five days. The time was up to Sakura. We discussed this with Kero and both him and I decided it would be best if Sakura waited 'till the last day to battle the man. That way she could train and be completely ready for the battle to come. However, she had already made up her mind. She would meet the man at the park that night and battle him. No amount of protesting from Kero or myself would change her mind, so I tagged along to make sure nothing happened.  
  
When we got to the park, the man was waiting. Not long after we arrived Sakura and the man began the battle. I could tell that Sakura wasn't doing well. The man had beaten every card she threw at him. She had cuts and bruises all over her. I must admit that I was worried about her. Something in the trees distracted me and I was brought back to the insuing battle by a cry of pain from Sakura. She had been wounded badly. Her left side was bleeding and she didn't have the strength to stand. The anger surged through me and I sent a lightning bolt straight through the mans heart, killing him. I had obviously caught him off guard, thus being able to kill him so easily. When I looked back at Sakura she didn't look so good. I knelt down beside her and grabbed her hand. I'll never forget the words she said to me. "Syaoran, please don't leave me." I was so happy at hearing her say my name that I couldn't find words at first. I finally managed to choke out an "I promise." To her. It was then that Sakura's onii-chan came crashing through the woods. He glared at me and when he saw Sakura he started yelling at me. He thought I'd hurt his sister. I could never bring myself to hurt such a beautiful cherry blossom. Tomoyo had been hiding in the bushes capturing everything on tape and now came running to Sakura's side. I heard Toya and Tomoyo talking and it didn't sound good. Toya picked Sakura up and rushed her to the hospital. Tomoyo promised to call me and let me know what the doctors said about Sakura. I nodded in agreement and Tomoyo rushed after Toya.  
  
I was numb. I didn't have the will to move nor the desire. As a warrior I was trained not to show emotion, but that night it took all my might to keep the tears at bay. It was also then that I realized how much I loved Sakura. I eventually got up and wandered around for the rest of the night. It was dawn when I finally reached my apartment. I noticed several phone messages and was about to listen to them when the phone rang. I answered it only to find Tomoyo at the other end. It was obvious she had been crying. "Li-kun, I've been trying to reach you all night. I've got some bad news, though." She paused, obviously trying to compose herself. "Sakura didn't make it through the night. There was nothing the doctors could do for her." I threw the phone against the wall, not caring if it broke. They held her funeral two days later. I wasn't invited. I can't say that I blame them. Toya still thought I was the one to blame. He'd even called the police on me. Tomoyo helped get me put of that situation, though. I watched the funeral from a distance. I figured I owed it to Sakura to at least say goodbye. The next day Tomoyo, Kero, and I had a meeting. Kero said that in Sakura's absence the cards had released themselves. I volunteered to retrieve them. 


	2. Moving On

Authors note: I so glad that you people reviewed! You like me! You really like me! Sorry, I just got a little excited. Anyway, I decided to get the next chapter out early. I'll probably post a chapter once a week or something like that. Thanks for bearing with me. I do not have the resources to keep my formatting ( I hope you like :p  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own CCS or CC, I just enjoy playing around with the characters.  
  
Chapter two: Moving On  
  
Every night at midnight I visit Sakura and bring her fresh cherry blossoms. Call me crazy, but I can almost feel her spirit every time I walk past a grove of Sakura trees. The rational, thinking part of me say's she's never coming back, but the other part of me begs me not to give up hope. It's always quite when I come here, but not long after I come I swear I can hear her voice talking to me. I can't make out everything she says, but one phrase always comes out clearly. "Syaoran, you promised you'd never leave me." "It's not like I had a choice!" I've screamed back at her many times. She never sees to hear me. My mother wanted me to go back home to Hong Kong. To take my place as leader of the Li clan. I declined. I can't go back when my feelings for Sakura are still so strong. I've toyed many times with the idea of using the time card to go back in time and keep Skaura from dying. I can never bring myself to actually do it, though. I always come up with ways I can still loose her. She may life, but what happens if she doesn't love me back or loves someone else, or marries someone else? In the end I always seem to loose. I can't seem to convince myself that it could all turn out good.  
  
Authors Note: I know this chapter is short, but I did it on purpose to draw the story out instead of having it be a one shot fic :P Please forgive. 


	3. The Test

Authors Note: Since the last one was so short, I took pity on my readers and posted the next one early. If you review I may post the next one very soon too ;) Anyway, I hope you enjoy and thanks for bearing with my formating. :P  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own CCS or CC I just love messing with their heads.  
  
Chapter3: The Test  
  
I hate school. I t just always seems to be a constant reminder that I will never sit behind her in class, eat lunch with her, or secretly watch her cheerleading practice. I'll never hear her laughter, see her smile, or get lost in her beautiful emerald green eyes. I think Tomoyo is the only one who feels the same way I do. She eventually found a boyfriend which helped ease the pain somewhat. I'm the most popular guy in High School and could have any girl I want, but the one I want I can't have. I'm resolved to the fact that I may die alone. I don't even want to consider someone taking Sakura's place. I just wish I could have told her sooner how I felt. It might have made a difference.  
  
Winter is beginning to settle in and I've almost re-captured all of the cards. With every card I capture, I feel that much closer to Sakura. It's almost as if the Clow cards are the link to Sakura's soul. There's a shrine not far from the cemetery. It's called the Shrine of Love. Supposedly if you bring some meaningful object, that symbolizes your feelings for a person, you will fall in love and become lovers with that person. I'm not sure how much I believe that, but couples come from all over to test their love. There is a legend about the shrine. Two people visited the shrine everyday. They each placed their objects at the shrine and waited for the results. Many months later, the two met and indeed fell in love. Their love was so pure that the shrine was forever called the Shrine of Love. I'm not sure I really believe in the shrines legend or the stories, but on my way home I managed to walk past it.  
  
The closer I get to the shrine, the more I feel a weird aura. It's familiar, yet at the same time foreign to me. Is it just my imagination or did the shrine start glowing pink? I'm deffinently feeling something and it's weirding me out. Maybe if I just walk past it really fast.  
  
"Li Syaoran."  
  
"Who's there?" I asked looking around. My eyes fell on the shrine and I saw a bluish-white form materialize in front t of me. It was definatly female and looked like a cross between Tomoyo and Meilin. "Who are you?" I asked again.  
  
"I'm and angel." She spread her wings for me to see. "Li-kun, I was sent here for a reason. No. Not to deliver any messages from beyond the grave or anything like that. I was sent here to see if I could help you move on. You've been grieving over Sakura for almost two years. It's time to let her go. Sakura's happy and so should you be."  
  
"I'm sorry, but I don't want to move on. If I do I'll eventually forget all about Sakura and I don't want that."  
  
"I see that there's no easy way to do this." She then smiled at me. "It's obvious that your love for Sakura is very strong. So, I propose a test. Bring a branch full of Cherry Blossoms, every night at midnight, and place them at the foot of the shrine. Do this for one week, starting tomorrow, and if at the end of the week not a single blossom has wilted you will have passed the test."  
  
"What's the purpose of this test?" I asked her.  
  
"To discover the way to move on." She replied then vanished. However the shrine continued to glow a bright pink. The color of Sakura's aura. Could it be that she somehow lived on in this shrine?  
  
The next day at school Tomoyo approached me after class. I was on my way to lunch and didn't notice her at first. "Li-kun, I had a weird dream last night I thought you should know about. In my dream I was taping the chearleading practice and Sakura walked out dressed in her uniform. She turned to me and winked before turning into an angel with a white dress and pink wings. She had a bright pink aura surrounding her. She then disappeared leaving a note behind. I read the note and it said 'give Li my love. Tell him that when the snow is thick and seven Cherry Blossom branches bloom, I will be closer to him than ever. Also tell him that when pink meets green, sparks fly. I wasn't sure what it meant, but I thought you might."  
  
"Thanks Tomoyo." I replied. At that moment I knew I had to pass the test.  
  
For the past six nights I've done as the angel said. I left a branch full of Cherry Blossoms at the foot of the Love Shrine every night at midnight. Tonight is the last night. I have butterflies in my stomach. I'm not sure what will happen. Will this bring back Sakura? Is someone just playing me for a fool? Will this turn back time and keep everything from happening? Did I just imagine the whole encounter with the angel? Without realizing it, my feet had brought me to the shrine with one minute to spare before midnight. At exactly midnight, I laid the cherry blossom branch I was holding with the others. I waited. Nothing happened. I was about to leave when I heard someone singing. It sounded a lot like the song Tomoyo had sung for the spring concert last year. I could clearly tell that it wasn't Tomoyo singing it, but who else could be singing that song? I looked around only to find I was completely alone. My eyes fell on the shrine again and it started to glow pink. It was a soft pink at first, then it started to glow bright pink. I looked down at the cherry blossoms and noticed them turning white. The shrine was sucking up their color! That's impossible, though. The voice singing became louder. I could clearly make out the words. Almost as if every word was speaking right to my heart.  
  
It's been years since we saw each other face to face  
  
And still I know you'll never leave my side  
  
Faithfully loyal to the end  
  
No matter what we've gone through  
  
Once we were rivals, now we're friends  
  
And I've got something to tell you  
I love you  
  
Now and forever I love you  
  
It's almost to good to be true  
  
That I love you  
  
But make no mistake  
  
It's 100% true  
  
Ashitiru  
  
I'd heard this song before, but It didn't mean anything until now. Whoever was singing this knew how to get their message to me. I've never heard Sakura sing, but I would bet my life that it was her voice singing. I looked back at the cherry blossoms by my feet and I saw something. My feet were glowing green! I looked at my hands which were also green. I had never seen it before, but I had no doubt that something or someone had made my green aura visible to myself. I heard that sweet angelic voice again.  
  
You made a promise to me that you'd never leave my side  
  
I can't really blame you for breaking it  
  
But it hurt so deep inside  
  
I'm sure you had your reasons why  
  
Just like I have mine  
  
I'm sorry I had to leave you behind  
  
I'll do what I can to come back to you  
  
But only if you'll keep this promise to me  
  
Promise me you'll love me forever  
  
For when a little wolf loves a cherry blossom  
  
Stars streak across the sky  
  
I couldn't believe it. I can't believe I'd just heard what I did. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that this voice belonged to Sakura. She'd added that last two lines of the song so I'd know it was her. Without thinking I looked up at the sky and said "I promise to love you forever, Sakura-chan." Then I saw it. Stars Streaked across the sky and where pink met green sparks flew. Then the angel appeared again. She looked at me and said. "You have passed the test. You've proven that your love for Sakura is very strong. You will receive your reward in due time." Then she vanished and I was left standing there, wondering what would happen next. 


	4. Love's Reward

Authors Note: Thanks to those who reviewed. Although it wasn't as many as I would have liked, I can't really expect too much from my first CCS fic. Anyway, here's the last chapter. Enjoy  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own CCS or CC so don't sue :p  
  
Chapter 4: Love's Reward  
  
Another week went by and I started to get impatient. I was wondering if it all wasn't a dream. Today was Monday, one week after I had finished the test at the shrine. It had started to snow by now, and the snow was very thick. Oddly enough the Cherry Blossom trees were still in bloom. I'd kept visiting her grave every night to see if it had dissapeared or anything like that. It was still there. I walked into my first class and sighed as I sat down. Tomoyo heard this and asked what was wrong. "Nothing, "I replied. The teacher walked in meaning class was about to begin.  
  
"Class," the teacher began. "I'm sure most of you remember one of your fellow classmates wanting to take part in an exchange program two years ago." Everyone nodded. "Well, I'd like you to welcome back Kinimoto Sakura from America."  
  
My pen fell out of my hand. Had I just heard what I thought I'd heard? I looked up at the door to see a tall, beautiful girl with bright emerald green eyes and auburn hair. Her hair was longer, but it no doubt was Sakura. I stared in utter disbelief.  
  
"Miss Kinimoto, if you will take the seat in front of Li Syaoran." The teacher said.  
  
"Hai." Sakura replied in her angelic voice.  
  
I stole a glance at Tomoyo and she was staring with her jaw almost on the floor. I was glad I wasn't the only one surprised to see Sakura again. Sakura smiled at Tomoyo and slipped her a note. I was curious about the note, but I let it go. After all it wasn't my business. The rest of the day I spent trying to get Sakura alone so I could talk to her, but it didn't work out. I left the school feeling left out. I ended up at the cemetery and decided to look for Sakura's grave. I discovered it was gone. Shocked, I ran to the love shrine and found a note taped to it with my name on it. I opened the letter and read:  
  
Dear Li Syaoran,  
  
I'm sure you are very confused. Meet me and Tomoyo at the park tonight and I'll explain everything.  
  
All my love, Sakura  
  
I ran home as fast as I could. I had some things I needed to do before I met her tonight. Later that night I arrived at the park to find Tomoyo sitting on a bench by herself. It was obvious that Sakura had yet to arrive. I sat down next to Tomoyo and for what seemed like a long time, there was an uncomfortable silence. Tomoyo was the first to speak.  
  
"I walked by the cemetery today and discovered Sakura's tombstone was missing. She told me to meet her here, but I'm not sure why. I don't know if I trust my eyes. How could Sakura be dead and then two years later come back to life?"  
  
I didn't know what to say. Tomoyo had just voiced the exact things I was wondering. I was about to say something, when I noticed movement out of the corner of my eye. Tomoyo must have noticed it to because she looked in the same direction as me. A lone figure walked up to us. As soon as the figure was close enough, I recognized it as Sakura. I was about to say something, but she put up her hand signaling us to be quiet and listen.  
  
"I can understand your confusion," Sakura began ,"So let me tell you my story. Two years ago I was fighting an evil being. I was badly injured and rushed to the hospital. As I was lying on the bed, a bluish- white woman visited me. She told me that she was an angel and she gave me a choice. I could allow myself to die and go to heaven where my mother was, or I could live on in something else. The later option meant that I could only return to my body if the person I loved proved his love for me to the angel. It would be leap of faith and may take several years. I thought about it and decided to put my trust in the one I loved and chose the second option. The angel agreed and she found a temporary home for me in a shrine that was fittingly called, the Shrine of Love. I had no idea how long it would take someone to find me, but I never gave up hope. I knew that some day I would be found and set free and that day has come. I was planning on going to America as an exchange student, but I died before I could. However, it made a good alibi for when I came back. So, now I'm back for good." Tomoyo and I were speechless. "Come on you guys. Say something." Sakura pleaded.  
  
"Well, we're just kinda in shock." Tomoyo explained. "After all you were gone for two years. We had to get used to you not being here anymore. Now we have to get used to you being here again." Tomoyo continued.  
  
Understanding seemed to register on Sakura's face. I think she realized the shock her appearance caused. I felt bad. I wanted to say something to make her feel good, but no words would come.  
  
"Well," Tomoyo spoke up, "since your here to stay, I guess we've got some catching up to do." She smiled cheerfully at Sakura, who returned her smile. Tomoyo stood up to leave with Sakura. Sakura whispered something in Tomoyo's ear , then Tomoyo left Sakura and I alone. Sakura walked over to the bench and sat down.  
  
"Li-kun, are you all right?" Sakura asked while staring at the ground. It was obvious that she was nervous.  
  
"Um.I.I'm fine." I stuttered also looking at the ground. I was still in shock. I couldn't believe that my wish had come true. Sakura surprised me with her next question.  
  
"Are you glad that I'm not dead?"  
  
I didn't know how to respond. Several silent minutes went by. I felt bad not answering her, but I wasn't sure I trusted the words that would come out of my mouth. My heart told me to tell her how I felt, but my brain told me to keep quiet. I didn't know which one to listen to .  
  
"I'm sorry if I was to forward." Sakura apologized.  
  
"It's not your fault." I replied. "I'm glad that you came back."  
  
After the words left my mouth, I stole a glance at her and saw a smile creep up her face. She was also blushing. Then she looked up at me almost like she knew I was looking at her. For a moment I got lost in her emerald green eyes and I could feel myself blushing.  
  
"I'd better not keep Tomoyo-chan waiting." Sakura said. She then took my hand, squeezed it and whispered, "Thank you Syaoran."  
  
She said my name! Her sweet angelic voice had spoken my name! I watched her go and mentally kicked myself for being stupid enough not to tell her how I felt when I had the chance.  
  
The next few days were spent trying to talk to Sakura. Everyone kept crowding around her and asking questions about America. Finally on Friday I found her sitting alone on one of the benches outside of the school. I noticed that she was trying to eat her lunch without much success. I started to walk towards her when Tomoyo showed up. I started to walk away when Tomoyo called to me.  
  
"Li-kun, come sit with us."  
  
Knowing I couldn't leave now, I turned and walked over to where Sakura and Tomoyo were sitting. The closer I got, the more I realized how sad Sakura looked.  
  
"Oh, I think I left my camera on in my locker. I'll see you guys in class." Tomoyo said winking at me.  
  
"May I sit here?" I asked Sakura.  
  
"Hai." She replied, blushing a little.  
  
I noticed that she hadn't touched her lunch. "Not hungry?" I asked.  
  
She blushed and proceeded to stuff food in her mouth. I couldn't help but smile at how kwaii she looked. She noticed this and blushed even redder. I then realized I'd surprised her by giving her one of my rare smiles. She swallowed her food and then asked what I'd been up to in her absence. I filled her in on the things that happened. Things like becoming captain of the soccer team, re-capturing the Clow cards, and deciding not to become leader of the Li clan. Before long it was time to go inside.  
  
After school I offered to walk Sakura home. Tomoyo had already left with her boyfriend and I didn't want Sakura to walk home by herself. Fortunately, over the past two years Sakura's brother and I had put our differences behind us. Although I wouldn't say we'd become friends, we just agreed to put the past behind us. About a block from Sakura's house we walked by a grove of Sakura trees. There was one lone cluster of blossoms on the tree and I stopped to pick it. I handed them to Sakura, blushing slightly. She smiled and we continued walking. When we reached her house I stopped her before she went inside.  
  
"Sakura-chan," I began. "There's something I have to tell you." I paused trying to clam my nerves and say what I wanted to say.  
  
"What is it Syaoran-kun?" Sakura asked obviously trying to help me find the words.  
  
"Ashitiru, Sakura-chan."  
  
I looked up into her emerald eyes and saw her whole face light up as the words registered. She threw her arms around me and said, "Ashitiru, Syaoran-kun."  
  
I was surprised, but quickly recovered, wrapping my arms around her. After a few minutes we broke the embrace. I looked at her beautiful face and did what I had wanted to do for two years. I kissed her passionately on the lips. I knew then that everything would be all right. That everything was the way it should be. A little wolf and his cherry blossom. Together forever.  
  
The End 


End file.
